Milk

“At home in Paris I take a milk bath two times a week...” ~ Anna Held.

Spoiling yourself and caring for your body is a necessity. It affects your spirit & energy in life. It's funny but this doll owes most of her rigid Beauty regimen to her body art. It takes a great effort to maintain the masterpiece of mind, body and spirit. But it does come with the territory of feeling & looking your best. One my favorite ways is a lotion bath otherwise known as a milk bath. Right now I get to miss out on those for a minute to do some proper healing. Do you take care of your vessel? What things do you do to maintain your youthfulness? 


Here's a 400 about meditating in the tub... 


PS: try a milk bath sometime dolls!  You won't regret it!

Enjoy!
Kisses, m.

Breathe

(1-5-2011)

Slinking into the white porcelain basin beneath the velvet blanket of wetness my skin slides until the top of my breasts are visible. From outer reaches beyond the white-wash of the bathroom door there’s the loud sounds of a television. It’s irrelevant what the sounds are in reference to as I count.

In. Out. One by one they escape my nose and mouth like bastard children sprang from passionate moments. One preceding one after another. Each sounds like an inverted rush of wind. Pushing in. Rushing out. There’s no battle but the force can be felt within.

The top of my feet are exposed enough for my toenails to be seen. My eyes pick apart visible red upon pink cracked paint hiding bare simplicity as I reach 35. I think I counted 25 the minute before last after the soapy wetness begins to evaporate into anything but still water.

Up. Down. My chest lifts. Rises to the rhythm of air. A moment longer and I’m counting to 40. Chest tightens quickly. And I’m thinking that somewhere I read that this is not normal before I sink further into the tub to listen.

Head remains partially submerged to the ears.

The distant vibration of the television’s din remains until all sound becomes quiet.

The same warmth of wetness surrounds my bare skin. My eyes look around in the same wonder and feel instead of listen. The cool air upon the red and pink brilliance awakens my skin into electricity. The gooseflesh runs up both legs wrapped inside the velvet blanket.

Beneath the blanket there’s no more numbers. No thoughts of measure. Nameless without their count. Air held tightly in cavities inside. My mind pregnant with thought. Thinking that there are dozens of them waiting to become once again. Released.

Trapped within. A feeling that seems ancestral grows. Without rise or fall it becomes.

In the vacuum of nothing. The feeling slowly becomes noise that is recognized. Familiar like an old memory. The sound of my heart fills the silence. Pounding. A moving rhythm in my ears. The beating of life continues without the movement of breathing. Listening to every beat without count. Needless to be counted. Known to themselves without identity.  Slowly the feeling in my chest lessens as the pulsation of blood begins to slow.

Deep within the white basin lies a feeling more than sound becomes audible without measure.

Found

Of course you turn around there you find yourself. Sometimes you find yourself in love again or making a new friend or losing love & friends. Our path finds us where we need to be. I am found... mostly writing alot of fiction these days. I want love but remind myself that I am love & have love within. Love attracts love. :) 

So... Writing has been filling up almost everyday with few days break here and there for a while now. I do want to stop but my instincts guide me to press further in. It's amazing to be in the new space of being able to keep going. 

For people who have asked what I am working on... D vol 2: The D-Women, Full Intention (book?), TIA and a new group of 400s. I have a few things I want to publish soon. 

Anyway, this is a new piece. New in the sense as...  I wrote it in late January or early February. I'm hesitant to say more, only that I did say I wasn't writing about my past loves... well this was written before that notion came upon me. And I hold firm to that. There will be no personal work newer to the already completed pieces. Unless my future paramour encourages it...  

The piece is a 400 about missing someone. I will say it was not a lover. But someone I loved in my past not about this year or present moment. And Yet you will see what you want & internalize or displace onto others or yourselves... Fuck it people will think what they want as they've always done! I'm thinking of Matisse! 

Enjoy!
Kisses, m. 

Missing

(2-23-2014)

I miss him. 

Part of me does.

I shouldn’t but I do. 

His hair, his big smile. 

The way he stares into my eyes when he’s talking. 

It’s like there’s no one else in the world when he is talking. 

And I can’t help but match his smile.

Watch his eyes. Let the moment happen.

Happy. Relaxed. 

Calm. 

And then I ruin the moment. 

Because I wonder if he misses me. 

Logic tells me he shouldn't. 

It stings. 

For a moment I accept my world without him.

I have to. 

Because these are mere breathes. 

We both have to return to our lives. 

This is something I knew from the time we met. 

I knew he couldn’t stay 

But I decided to love him anyway. 

My instincts guided me to openly embrace a love for him. 

Trust his smile, his presence.

Feel the warmth and energy of his aura deep within my heart.

Actively engage in the time we have together.

I felt differently for him instantly.

Perhaps even before we met. 

The first time I saw his eyes.

Their electricity drew me in.

My soul always longed to know them.

Then it did. 

And the world dropped away.

Once we met it wasn’t new but it was different.

I knew I’d never feel for another man this way.

I could feel a sense, a freedom from loving him.

In brief moments we stand still

My soul reaches toward his. 

And his soul reaches out toward mine. 

Yet we don’t allow a connection to grow

Before walking away.

In small instances...

I wonder if he’s thought of me in my absence. 

I wonder if he’s ever stopped to visualize me. 

I wonder if he’s thought of my eyes and my smile the same as I think of his.

And all of this wondering serves no tangible purpose in reality. 

It’s my heart thinking for my head and hoping for something that has yet to be. 

Calm fills my heart as my mind realizes and accepts this

Without him I fall backwards into my thoughts. 

Yet I release my urge to cling.

My energy embraces the entirety of who he is. 

I can see his eyes, feel his breath and recall the touch of his hands.

In his absence I make no demands or beg for completeness

Because I know soon this absence will all be no more than…

A Memory. 

Joy

Joy. What's joy to you? Enjoying an soothing blissful embrace vs an embrace to soothe unblissful tears. Yeah you know which one I'd prefer. ;) Life's too beautiful and the journey to short to quarrel! Let's...

 

Fuck! Crying! Especially over shit you can't control. You can't own or control people. 

 

Blowing off things you want to do in order to please someone else, like a paramour... Well that's a waste of your time and talent. If you blow shit off... do it for yourself! Why? If someone asked you to or tried to block you from doing something, they don't respect you and that's not love. Doing it for yourself is self love. It's not a failure. 

 

Love lifts & encourages! It doesn't suffocate, tie you up or down, cut off your arms, legs or hair, complain about your absence and demand to own you. People who love you miss you, yet they continue to have their own life.

 

People choose to suffer needlessly and yep they will manipulate you to make themselves happy. Fuck em. I cry when I'm upset or in pain... Beyond that, eh? I do my best not indulge the whim... For too long. If I do I get help... And I am not inadequate for that. 

 

Life's simple. Just let it happen. Make yourself happy. If you can't. Try to stop worrying. Try to stop controlling people & things. Let them happen. They will happen anyway. Chaos is fucking magic. Create it. Embrace it. Run toward it. Get angry if you want. It's a valid feeling too. Do not place your happiness in things you can not control. There will be pain in other places, don’t look for it or create it.

 

Here's a 400.

Enjoy the ride!

I am! Oh and even though it's been a minute... I know my favorite Ken is enjoying it too! He almost always does! So I really don't worry. 

Are you enjoying yourself? Hmm... Why aren't you?

Kisses, m.

Crying

(4-6-2010)

Crying. Deep within my throat it starts. The tightness thickens until it’s hard to swallow. There are no more words between us. I’m upset. Something he knows without asking. Blinking and swallowing. My ego attempting to lick its wounds and maintain a sense of poise. A thousand things I want to say yet I can not form them into words.

Speechless. Unable to vocalize my hurt, I can only manage to stand still. Instead of exuding a cool calm I appear shell-shocked. Eyes pool with a watery grace as he stares me down. He is the representation of perfect composure. Anger fills my chest and it restricts. Calmly his eyes assess my body actions. Heart beating out of control. Afraid of the next moment when I loose myself to the emotions.

The heat of the first drop of saline against my cheek sends me spinning around. I can not face this battle in weakness. Like a wounded solider I’m bleeding out. Salty fluid slides down the side of my face burning lines into the skin as it moves downward. Before I can manage to walk away he reaches from behind slowly wrapping both of his arms around my chest. Sobs expel out into the quiet.

Screaming for release until there’s no air. Chokes of saliva mixed with tears of anger reach out into the stillness. Both of my arms wrestle to break free of his grasp. Tightly he embraces my raging body and rests his head upon my shoulder. Saline continues to flow liberally from my sealed eyes. Blinded by the uncontrollable tantrum, a fury storms within. His arms hold firm as his breath remains constant against my neck. Two secure anchors pulling me in close to keep the wild emotion from wandering away with my mind.

Hurt for all the wrong reasons. Pain that translates into agonizing cries. Unable to see the argument in perspective. Calm steady heartbeats pound against my back. His collected movements attempt to calm the disorder within. Weeping has replaced the outburst. Slowly he loosens his grip without letting go. Tender words provide a haven to my troubled mind. Restraint becomes an embrace. Wails replaced by whimpers. Peacefully I begin to lean into the folds of his arms. Liquid escapes down my cheek as the frenzy diminishes into sadness. Around he spins my conceding form. Face to face. Gently wipes the tears from my eyes.

Between

Moments between moments... How do you spend them? 

Far away from others letting canyon sized emptiness fill between...

Or... 

Do you fill the between by enjoying moments with others? 

I love my moments spent with others. I treasure them. And this doll knows her favorite Ken does the same. In fact she strongly insists he makes time in his busy day without enough hours to enjoy the moments between work, life and love.

Anyhoo... Here's a story about a pair of a acquaintances running into each other between things and what better way to share a moment than a dance?!

Enjoy!

Kisses, m.

Care to dance?

(1-13-2011)

“Care to dance? Find a little comfort in a stranger’s arms?”

“It’s been a while but we’re hardly strangers.”

“Of course we’re not. Come let’s dance for a while.”

“I’m sorry but I wasn’t thinking of dancing just yet.”

“Simply think of it as keeping me company. Nothing of strings, rendezvous, or love affairs. Just a spin around the dance floor. Nothing more than a dance. Foxtrot? Waltz?”

“Hold me. Spin me. Thrill me.”

“Now you have the idea. Tell me what brings you out among the lonely hearts tonight? I thought your dance card was full.”

“It was something like that for a bit. And now I’ve found it to be empty.”

“Well, it won’t be long until your card fills up and the line forms again.”

“I hope you’re right. Shall we old friend? And you can tell me what brings you here.”

“It’s been awhile now. He left before there could be anything. Afraid of what hasn't happen. Beat me to the start like so many times I had in the past. The whole time knowing what it was like as I watched him run out of fear.”

“Do you remember what it was like when you held that fear? Dip.”

“Yes, I remember how the world was. Nothing like it is now. Maybe I could’ve...? I’m a fool.”

“You can’t blame yourself for his actions. We’re all afraid at one point. Some run the wrong way. Was it love?”

“Couldn’t say. I liked him. Nice fellow. There’s no way to know about that now. And the last one that filled your card?”

“She wanted something that wasn’t there. Looking for something when all she had to do was believe in it.”

“Why do you think that is?”

“The dissatisfaction? I don’t know. But it’s nothing I could change. She had to decide.”

“Some people can’t decide.”

“This is true. Feel free to lean in.”

“Can I? It’s not an imposition?”

“Not at all.  I’m enjoying your company.”

“Likewise. This is lovely.”

“It is. But let’s have a spin first. Then you can come closer.”

“Very nice. I had no idea you could dance like this.”

“Thank you. It’s been nice to dance with good company.”

“You’re welcome. I’ve enjoyed this too. And now from the looks of it your card is about to get a new entry.”

“So it is. Care to dance a little longer?”

Be Still

tylershields.com

Perhaps it's no big affair when love happens. Perhaps there's no need for bells and whistles when you find yourself giving and receiving love. Perhaps it's just the timing. You can't be worried about missing out on the passing world or you miss what is in the present moment.  Be still and it will come to you. Let it.

Buddhism describes our life as experience and imparts that we adopt the interconnectedness of that existance  We are all the same and very different, yet we are independently dependent on each other in the grand scheme the universe. For love, for hope and for nourishment, physically and spiritually. There's nothing wrong with needing someone and even further there's nothing wrong with admitting you want to need someone. 

We might feel independent in choosing to grab fresh vegetables and eggs from the market stand in the square on a Saturday but those things couldn't be available for our enjoyment without the connectedness of so many other people in the cycle. The farmer cultivates the crops, the delivery truck takes it to the market and the merchant selling the wares place it into our hands. Much like the connectedness we feel in the market and ultimately in the universe of living, such is the connectedness of love in the universe. You must independently love and appreciate yourself to find the enjoyment in what others bring to you.When you have much to give... you will simply give it freely. Until then you learn to accept it from all the sources you've been given. 

Enjoy!
Kisses, m.



Affair

(6/14/11)

“As I can recall it’s a lot more attention than I want to draw…” he says it with a smile that lets me know that he’s in.

But of course he’s in. He’s always in.

The lobby of the hotel where we meet is always packed by the rush hour hustle of people escaping back into their lives while we’re escaping into each other’s arms. Every time we meet again it’s another excuse when it shouldn’t be.

Tumbling away from his arms I throw myself face first into the sheets to muffle my screams of pure sheer ecstasy.

Like clockwork and the steady hands of a timepiece we’ve finished making love on the floor next to the bedroom for the third time when it happens, the same as it always happens.

“No more. We shouldn’t...” I tell him.

He moves his hands a little further down past my waist and leaves them on the back of my thigh. “You always do this. You want to do this. Shhh.”

“It’s always what we want. Don’t you think we’re being selfish?” I posture my question and place three small kisses on his chest.

“Selfish. What could be selfish about love?” He turns the question back at me while playing with the soft flesh on the back of my knee.

As we embrace there’s a man with a woman possibly his wife watching us in silence. Between our breathing sounds I can see them stare from the corner of my eye while he leans in to kiss my neck. Attention, it’s always more than we need but there’s no denying the need for us. The couple moves on while we lose ourselves in another kiss.

“Love? I guess… it’s not what I’m saying. Don’t you think it’s unfair how we do this? We have to run away together, this way. The escape from our…”

“Lives? How else would we? Can you imagine if we didn’t escape?”

“The thought of having to make this work between our lives seems impossible… Yet we do.” My words are softer as I look into his eyes.

“We make this work?” The beat of his heart makes mine stop as he leans to kiss me.

Outside I let him hold me closer than before when he asks, “Are you sure?”

“Absolutely. No more excuses.”

“As I can recall it’s a lot more attention than I want to draw…”

Embrace the moment

Lovers in Paris c/o tylershields.com

Someone tells me to hug someone means to lose yourself... I never heard of that, until last week. Weird week. People tend to hug me, often. I take nothing from such exchanges except a sense of human kindness, unless it's a family member or loved one. Otherwise it's merely a moment much like a handshake. It just is. Yet some might think that embracing people means losing oneself while others think that embracing everyone means feeling connected. Perhaps when you are embracing the right person you are not losing a thing and connected to everyone already without touching. No clue... Here's a story about an embrace between a couple walking and reminds me of a happy pair that I did happen to see with their locked hands and smiles. Enjoy your happiness and don't forget to embrace your moments together! Kisses, m. 

Tighter

(2-2-2011)

Through the low lights of approaching evening we are two that become one. Hand in hand walking, our arms locked into each other while our feet match the same stride. The graceful descent of the sun cascades a shadow of lavender across the horizon and a slight chill to the air. The houses seem quieter and less than inviting to our passing steps. Our movements manage to dance in unison through this empty street alone without notice.

The silence that surrounds us sends him into a whimsical mood. With a slip of a hand his arm wraps over and around me with a spin stopping our forward pace. Closer he turns me again and again before taking me in. Hugging gently, his sliding arms circle and lock around my torso. His fingers interlace behind my back. Each finger reaches inward as if to take me in whole. Tighter.

Attempting to match his embrace, my hands scramble. Both arms are struggling to return his hold. Dancing with his merging frame, tighter they squeeze and begin moving closer together. Carefully my probing hands find their way around his body until one ends where another begins. Locking in a grip that rests in the small of his back while my head finds its place upon his chest. Tighter.

The night becomes cooler in our surroundings. Light purple becomes a deeper violet and we’re wrapped around each other in a hold. Our arms are gripping each other securely and pulling without restraint until there is nothing between them. The crushing force of our weight against each other completes the circle. My face rests on his chest looking up into his eyes. His eyes look down into mine and he releases a heavy breath upon my face. I rest my lips upon his neck with a gentle kiss and squeeze. His arms return the constriction and his lips touch my forehead. Our breathing sounds deeper through the force of our embrace. Strained shallow breathes escape with a heaviness that’s familiar. Tighter.  

Our bodies have no beginning and no end in the last light of the day. There are no sounds around us. No streets, no houses,  and no one walking through the night. There’s only this feeling of security in our circle. In this moment we’re all alone. Alone in the world but we’re connected in our own moment. There’s nothing and no one anymore.

Let's go for a walk...

Couple walking c/o tyler shields photography

Do you like taking walks? Alone or with someone? I find that even couples have the hardest time planning a moment to be alone together. Walks are quite a nice way to talk and enjoy each other's company.... Among other things. Needless to say although I am once again writing new things thanks to a lovely friend and writing workshop, this is an older piece. Enjoy! Kisses, m.

Together

(10-21-2010)

 “Can we?”  He says.

“It’s been one of those days at the end of a very long week. Can we have a daydream together?” He insists with a smile and leans his head a little to the left and touches the back of my neck with his warm hand.  

A long week that never ends. Work. And nothing but that. When it seems there’s no chance for escape, then you find it. Resting in front your thoughts and granting your soul peace. The golden light of day shining vividly across the bright waters of paradise. Miles and miles of coastline. White sands and the sounds of surf crashing along the line of coast. Birds call and dive in and out of the cool bright waters.

 “Oh I don’t know it’s been a very long day.” I tell him in a small jest. “And it’s the end of the week.” He lowers his face to look me in the eye as his smile widens with my unconvincing response.

“Please. You know you want to.” He insists. “If I want to, then you know you want to.” He looks at me and presses his lips together with a smile. I can’t remember ever saying no to him when he does this. So I don’t.

“Yes of course I do. I miss it a lot lately.” I smile and blush as he grabs at my hands that try to stay busy.

The warm sunlight touches my bare skin. I ask him if maybe we can stay longer this time. I tell him I like it here. This is my favorite one. He agrees and suggests we keep looking for find a place to enjoy it. With this he keeps walking and I follow with my hand tucked around his waist.

“Oh, how I do miss it.” I stop to look at him and nod.

“See. What better reason for it.” He tells me and pulls me closer toward him again.

“Alright, let’s have a moment in the clouds.” I’m curious and the thought of a temporary escape from the day to day banal sounds divine.

He tells me to look at the water. So I ask him what is there. He points out all the birds diving and catching fish as they rise. I can feel the breeze sweep across my skin and the goose-bumps that run up and down his arm.

He is full of animation and laughter with my agreement. I can see the wheels in his head turning already with anticipation as his arm holds mine tighter and pulls me inward further. As I lean against his chest I can see that unmistakable look in his eyes. It’s the one of pure wild imagination. He’s probably thought of how we’ll get there. Wherever there will be. It’s half the fun of not knowing where we’ll end up before this begins. So he gets ready. Setting the scene. Placing the idea of spontaneity in the front of his mind and preparing to run with it.

The air has the distinct smell of the ocean in it as the wind continues to carry through my hair. In the sand his feet lift and fall in a less than routine pattern. The moment feels like forever as we’re walking and I’m leaning. He runs his hand across my skin and touches my neckline before asking when I want to go. I tell him just a little longer. It’s been a long week. And he says we can take as long as we need.

“Where would you like…” His mood is more subdued when I ask him this. He looks down into my eyes as I smile waiting for his response.

“How do you feel about the Pacific Northwest?” He tells me through a smile that shows a few teeth. I know this is a joke and play along.

“Eh? How about something a little more arctic? Alaska? Antarctica?” I wrap my loose arms around him with a play shiver and look into his gaze that pretends to drift but stays quite present in the moment with his grin.

“Use your imagination. Think a little more worldly and exotic. And not like that last one. I loved the African jungle. But why not…”

“Oh, exotic and worldly. How about uncharted?”

“I like that. Now you’re getting into it.” he says and wraps his arms around me tighter.

“Nothing like before. Let’s do somehing…”

“Different. How about a walk on the beach together?”

“I thought you’d never ask. Shall we?”

Hold on

The World has much to offer and you should always reach for it while holding on to what's in front of you. There are things to let go of in life and things to keep reaching for. If you're lucky then you've found the one thing you'll never let go of while reaching for those dreams. Keep holding on to it... Love is grand & full of romance among other things that have nothing to do with being romantic... if you let it happen. You're only a hopeless romantic if you give up on yourself. Be a hopeful romantic! Find, be and stay in Love!

Anyhoo... Here's another bit of photo art that I was playing with a few weeks ago [it really wasn't supposed to see the light of day but some people can't seem to stay out of my photo library... *a little self control please] and a 400 which was a piece I had considered for my first e-book of short fiction Between The Sheets. You can buy my ebook here! Enjoy life, love and breathing.

PS: For those asking & emailing me about my return to posting fiction on the blog... Please think of Matisse for now. I will have an answer or rather something to share soon.

kisses, m.

golden gate vs the lovers 2013

 

 

Tighter.

(2-2-2011)

Through the low lights of approaching evening we are two that become one. Hand in hand walking, our arms locked into each other while our feet match the same stride. The graceful descent of the sun cascades a shadow of lavender across the horizon and a slight chill to the air. The houses seem quieter and less than inviting to our passing steps. Our movements manage to dance in unison through this empty street alone without notice.

The silence that surrounds us sends him into a whimsical mood. With a slip of a hand his arm wraps over and around me with a spin stopping our forward pace. Closer he turns me again and again before taking me in. Hugging gently, his sliding arms circle and lock around my torso. His fingers interlace behind my back. Each finger reaches inward as if to take me in whole. Tighter.

Attempting to match his embrace, my hands scramble. Both arms are struggling to return his hold. Dancing with his merging frame, tighter they squeeze and begin moving closer together. Carefully my probing hands find their way around his body until one ends where another begins. Locking in a grip that rests in the small of his back while my head finds its place upon his chest. Tighter.

The night becomes cooler in our surroundings. Light purple becomes a deeper violet and we’re wrapped around each other in a hold. Our arms are gripping each other securely and pulling without restraint until there is nothing between them. The crushing force of our weight against each other completes the circle. My face rests on his chest looking up into his eyes. His eyes look down into mine and he releases a heavy breath upon my face. I rest my lips upon his neck with a gentle kiss and squeeze. His arms return the constriction and his lips touch my forehead. Our breathing sounds deeper through the force of our embrace. Strained shallow breathes escape with a heaviness that’s familiar. Tighter.

Our bodies have no beginning and no end in the last light of the day. There are no sounds around us. No streets, no houses, and no one walking through the night. There’s only this feeling of security in our circle. In this moment we’re all alone. Alone in the world but we’re connected in our own moment. There’s nothing and no one anymore.

Enjoy the silence.

What's in your arms? Nothing? Well... Ok, then humor me and cross your arms. Do it. What's in your arms now is all you'll ever need... You. Every now and again something amazing happens and someone comes along deciding they will lend you their arms or vice versa. That is something amazing and now you have more than yourself to care for. And I can think of no better way to lose oneself than in a moment spent in another's arms. Do you like to lose yourself in moments? enjoy. kisses. m.




Tighter.

(2-2-2011)

Through the low lights of approaching evening we are two that become one. Hand in hand walking, our arms locked into each other while our feet match the same stride. The graceful descent of the sun cascades a shadow of lavender across the horizon and a slight chill to the air. The houses seem quieter and less than inviting to our passing steps. Our movements manage to dance in unison through this empty street alone without notice.

The silence that surrounds us sends him into a whimsical mood. With a slip of a hand his arm wraps over and around me with a spin stopping our forward pace. Closer he turns me again and again before taking me in. Hugging gently, his sliding arms circle and lock around my torso. His fingers interlace behind my back. Each finger reaches inward as if to take me in whole. Tighter.

Attempting to match his embrace, my hands scramble. Both arms are struggling to return his hold. Dancing with his merging frame, tighter they squeeze and begin moving closer together. Carefully my probing hands find their way around his body until one ends where another begins. Locking in a grip that rests in the small of his back while my head finds its place upon his chest. Tighter.

The night becomes cooler in our surroundings. Light purple becomes a deeper violet and we’re wrapped around each other in a hold. Our arms are gripping each other securely and pulling without restraint until there is nothing between them. The crushing force of our weight against each other completes the circle. My face rests on his chest looking up into his eyes. His eyes look down into mine and he releases a heavy breath upon my face. I rest my lips upon his neck with a gentle kiss and squeeze. His arms return the constriction and his lips touch my forehead. Our breathing sounds deeper through the force of our embrace. Strained shallow breathes escape with a heaviness that’s familiar. Tighter.  

Our bodies have no beginning and no end in the last light of the day. There are no sounds around us. No streets, no houses,  and no one walking through the night. There’s only this feeling of security in our circle. In this moment we’re all alone. Alone in the world but we’re connected in our own moment. There’s nothing and no one anymore.

I heard a rumor...

"I heard a rumor... " Bananarama. Do you like rumors? is gossip your middle name? Well I heard a few rumors that I'm assured are quite true... There's a new Austin Powers movie being made, AFI Blaqk Audio finished their album and that some people are hungry for more writing. Exciting. Now if any of those rumors are not for you then keep on moving, I'm sure you'll find what you're looking for elsewhere. I hear that Perez tells it best when it comes to things in question. For now... here's a spin on a couple of 400's. Which do you like? Light or Dark? Soft or Hard options? OR is it a little bit of both? enjoy. kisses. m. 

Closer. 

(1-15-09)

Closer. Gently I pull his face towards mine. Both hands holding his jaw firmly. Arms tightly locked with intent. Closer. So very innocently I look up into those eyes. Both arms remain at his sides. Trusting. Closer. His breath hits my cheek in deep heavy blows. Closer. Finally my face is resting against his. The tip of my nose meets his cheek. He remains still and solemn allowing my gentle affections to progress. Carefully my lips find their way upwards. Lightly I push tiny little kisses against his skin. Lips flit over and around the eyes. Delicate little flutters. Hot breath escapes the warmth of my open mouth as I continue to address the situation. Never breaking the grip of his jaw I begin nursing my target with the tenderness of a skilled surgeon. Without indicating any warning I gently open to spread my lips further. Mouth continues massaging the socket while my tongue is allowed to caress the lid and tickle the lashes. I begin to add a slight pressure to my mouthful. Drawing back I tenderly engulf the entirety of his eye within my lips. Slowly intensifying as I apply more suction with every stroke of my tongue. Quietly his breath increases with excitement. Tighter I grip onto his jawbone making it harder to break free. The pressure of my mouth growing deeper with every second while I continue to nurture and press into the opening. Drawing back with simple pleasure I persist. Sucking. Lips surround and seal. Tongue softly pushes back the lid until there is no barrier. With no more than a gasp I dislodge the eye. Gateway to the soul nestled in my jaw. Gentle tongue movements finding their way along the cord. His body is fully aware of the situation as every quick breath crashes against my skin. Appearing to be in complete rapture his face never breaks free from my grasp. I continue to provide suction against the cavity. Pulling back with quickness I release myself. Teeth sink in severing the arterial connection with a snap. The excruciating pain brings him down to his knees. Spit. Discard the useless piece of sight with little remorse. Hands frantically grabbing the vacant bloody hole. Taste the blood on my tongue. Listen as he unleashes the most horrifying sounds of anguish. Spit. Watch his body writhe in pain before me. Wipe the blood from my mouth.

Closer. #2

Closer. Gently I pull his face towards mine with a smile. Both hands holding his jaw firmly and I can feel the lines of his mouth lift to match my grin. Both my arms tightly locked with the intent to move in. So very innocently I look up into those eyes and try to match their gaze. He lowers his arms and I reach over. His breath hits my cheek in deep heavy blows of anticipation. Finally my face is resting against his and he’s waiting for it. The tip of my nose meets his cheek and I giggle. He remains still and solemn allowing my gentle affections to progress. Carefully my lips find their way upwards. Closer. Lightly I push tiny little kisses against his skin. Lips flit over and around the eyes before making their journey to the ears. Delicate little flutters of his eyes caress my face as I move. Hot breath escapes the warmth of my open mouth as I continue to address the situation. Never breaking my hold of his jaw I begin nursing my target with the tenderness of a skilled surgeon. The lobe of his ear is tender to my kiss. Without indicating any warning I gently open to spread my lips further for a tickle with my tongue. Mouth continues to move back around when he laughs at my silliness. Closer. Carefully I withdraw my lips and add a breath of warm air into his ear. He presses a slight pressure against my cheek with his lips. Drawing back I tenderly kiss his neck with my lips before climbing back up around his ear. His pressure against my skin slowly intensifies as I draw out my intention. Quietly his breath increases with excitement. Tenderly I hold onto his jawbone making it clear that he is to remain still. The sound of his breath is growing deeper while I continue to tickle and press into the opening with my breath. As he attempts to draw back with simple pleasure I persist in keeping him close. Waiting for a sound that hasn’t made its presence known, his nose presses against my cheek to tease it out. Closer. Finally the tip of my tongue softly pushes back against the top of my mouth until there is no barrier. With no more than a breath I tell him, “Do you want to know a secret?”