Monday, October 4, 2010

Six the hard way.

Roll a hard six. Sometimes life doesn’t give you much choice. So you give them what they want.

Six the hard way.

Something about needing a miracle makes me wish I wasn’t doing this.

Luck isn’t always a bad thing. Always been a lucky gal. Born with luck on my side. Lady luck as close as my own reflection. Truth be told it can be a curse. Sometimes wishing you could lose.

A little luck never hurts… Although I don’t think even my good luck can get me out of this one.

The thing is… as soon as good fortune smiles on you; you start to forget what it’s like to lose. You’re a winner cause you’re always a winner. Not whether you deserve it or not. The bullet misses you for no more of a reason that it hits the person next to you.

Maybe that’s why it’s Johnny on the ground instead of me.

Luck ain’t that the bitch of it all…

Dealer calls the game like it is. The odds are hard and the play is fast. You might miss something if you don’t pay attention.

Most of them aren’t paying attention as I roll the dice. Who would notice anything else except my Double-Ds and 26 six inch waist kicking to the beat of the jazzy tango that bumps out over the speaker system? Johnny always reminded me to use the clichĂ© whenever it was possible to get my way. He tells me that hips, tits and lips are to my advantage in any situation. The art of female seduction, make love to the room. Not one pair of eyes, all of them. Men won’t be able to resist looking and every woman in the room will seethe with jealously but continue looking.

They tell me to get up off the floor like my place isn’t on the floor next Johnny whose bleeding is coming out quicker than a faucet spills out water. Get up and answer to the next guy and the next guy next to him about a little of nothing because no one ever cares to know anything more than what I look like. Cause it’s like Johnny says when he wants his way… “Baby, no one cares about anything when you look like that. Don’t talk.”

So I don’t talk, and explain a little more with my eyes and purse my lips before moving my hands to the back of my hips to shift my breasts upward and use my feminine wiles to talk even less like Johnny says. What it does is work a little and the guy next to the guy starts smiling as he lowers his gun.

Roll the dice. The man standing between me and Johnny says “blow on ‘em,” so I do. Like I’m kissing the air with a push of breath. Johnny leans back and winks. We aren’t supposed to know each other and he loves to watch me work a crowd up. A stranger in the crowd that likes to lean in and rub the small of my back while no one is looking. A pass to the left a wink to the right. My kiss of luck always did the trick. Down goes the dice.

Luck missing him and hitting me always worked out that way. It was almost like that bullet had his name on it as it moved past me directly into him. Pressing into his flesh creating a deep cavity that releases blood. Faster. Harder. Deeper. Leaving nothing behind on its way in.

7:1. those are the odds of rolling a hard six. Every eye in the place is on me. All thinking I can do this. In this last ditch effort to save me and save Johnny I’m going for the gusto thinking that I’ve bitten off more than I can chew. But there’s no time for that kind of thought. Johnny needs me to do this. Johnny bleeding out in the back of the place needs me to make it happen. I need to think of how I can beat those odds.

Slight of hand is supposed to be quicker than the eye. That’s why I was supposed to be the one switching the dice. No one should have seen it happen. And they didn’t. That didn’t stop it from being seen.

Hand around my waist as he tells me to “Blow on em for luck” with a wink and a smile. Down falls the pair and they’re winning. All of them watching and whistling at the table winning once again. Thanks to me and lady luck. I smile and blow a handful of kisses out to the group. We’re almost all old friends at this table thanks to a handful of money that never falls short of full. One fellow can’t stand losing and doesn’t want to make nice so he leaves the group with a roar. There’s always the odd one out betting against the fortunate man for spite and jealousy. It’s funny what money can do to strangers.

It’s not long after we’re still running money that it happens. Around comes the man who bet against Johnny. And he’s bringing a pair of armed men with him. Before too long they’re pulling me by the arm and dragging Johnny by the scruff of his shirt out the back door into a back alley.

Cheating?”  Johnny flips the corner of his shirt back down and grabs his earlobe for a quick tug. This means play along and play it cool. The two thugs want a crook and Johnny won’t give 'em one as he looks my way. “Ma’am I don’t know about you but I wasn’t cheating in there. We aren’t cheating. Look fellows the way I see it you’ve got the wrong pair of people at the table… No harm no foul. How about me and the pretty lady leave nice and quiet?”

Quiet. That’s not the way it happened. When the gun went off it wasn’t quiet. After it misses me and hits him. I keep looking at the man with the gun instead of staring down at Johnny like I want to. He keeps insisting that Johnny tell how it was done. That’ll never happen. I know this and he shoots him again in the belly. The second round has me reacting and I know it’s over when I can’t help falling on the ground next to him.

“Get up!” They tell me and I stand up. Looking forward with my bust leading the way and listening for what they want. They’re telling me we’re still playing. Proving a fair game is what they’re saying. Guns are pointed at my waist and chest when they tell me that we’re using the same dice he was holding. Johnny winks and I know what that means. Don’t let them know. This is harder than it looks. But defying the odds is what I do. Just needing a miracle to keep it from happening.

We enter back in. Johnny is pushed off to a back corner while I’m dragged by the arm and put into the mix of the table.

“Baby blow on those dice for me.” I blow and smile at the man next to me who takes his turn and misses.

I swallow hard and think of Johnny one last time. Johnny bleeding in the back instead of dying in the alley. It’s up to me to make it happen. It’s my turn to roll. Roll em fast, roll em hard.

“Mama needs a new pair of shoes!” I call it hard and call it fast in the back of my mind wishing for the one thing that almost never happens. The one thing that points them in the wrong direction. The one time I need my luck to falter. Wishing my luck would fail just once. Once…


The dealer calls it hard and I’m out. I breathe a sigh of relief and turn my eyes to the back. No cheating. And they still don’t know there’s a pair of dice in my bra cause I’m a lucky lady.

Luck. It’s not always a good thing. Especially when the game is tough and winning is tougher. Tougher than losing. Tonight I’m a loser and winning so much more than a game.

Six the hard way. This was from… March. And the rooms. Finished up finally. The rooms, there were six… will drag up the last picture soon. And maybe more rooms? Submissions and other things are on my plate this month.  That’s an odd statement for moi but… Give me time and I’ll change the world. Mine at least. Never thought so much in one statement could happen in less than half a year. This is for more than one person who changed their world… I’m very excited for those of you who did something and accomplished it. That to me is so incredibly amazing. But don’t let that be enough. Keep reaching further. Set that balance bar higher than you expect to reach. Sometimes in life you have to take a risk. Gamble with what you have and that means losing. Sometimes losing is winning. You learn from what doesn’t work. This is in life, love and labor. Enjoy! Kisses. m.

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