Sunday, August 29, 2010


Hell is a Temporary State of Mind and Being. Once one has left their hell, they must forever keep in mind what brought them there. If you are not wary of your initial sin, you are doomed to repeat yourself over and over until your sin has embedded itself upon your memory. Hell is temporary but can be experienced more than once. To prevent such future experiences one would be wise to avoid thinking to high of oneself, however not to think to low of oneself either. Once you have been through Hell, then and only then, will you be able to understand life and all life that surrounds you. There is no Devil. We, in fact, are our own devils. We bring ourselves down low by our sins. Hell is regret, sin, and self-punishment for a crime, deed, or act we committed. Whether or not it involved another being is not important. Only the fact that we punish ourselves for committing it, is Hell. Hell, is indeed what you make it to be. If you release your regret and sin (HATE) you will free yourself of Hell. Hell is a Temporary State of Mind and Being.

This was written when I was in high school. While rearranging the room into other themes I came across a scrapbook with a few poems, and notes. This was in it. I’m always surprised to discover anything older. Nearly two years ago I threw out what I thought was everything I’d ever created, written, drew, etc. Bad breakup(s). Wrong reaction. I’m glad some of it survived. Because surviving, that’s the best revenge. The memory of writing this is quite uncanny timing. Then like now, I’m experiencing a little bit of recent rejection. And I’ve just been informed that one of my pieces was not accepted for publication. Which then like now, I wasn’t handling the rejection very well. When does anyone ever? Needless to say this was written as a means to accept the rejection and move past it. Lovely to find this little time capsule. Funny how sometimes you are the person that picks you back up.

Funny how a little bit of time changes the whole wide world. Isn’t it? They write songs about it “What a difference a day makes? – Dinah Washington.” (And I always think of Lola running and red lit rooms with that track.) It is called point of view. Your mind is your most powerful tool in this life. It is capable of so much more than people allow themselves to believe. If you can think it then it is possible. If you want to see the world differently then you shall. It's not always about being in love, but that can help at times. It’s really all about the attitude. The right one. 

Tonight. Anywhere but in Hell and somehow I doubt that it would be that bad. Learned an amazing new trick in pain management over the last few days and nothing after this could ever truly be the same. Have to once again say a Big ‘THANK YOU’ to the very thoughtful person who suggested/shared it with me. The people in our lives are extremely significant to us all. You should never take anyone you care about for granted. There are two obvious truths in the previous entry … this is from high school and I did toss out nearly everything about two years ago. Aside from surviving it is rough and possibly… definitely looking to revise it. Currently going through photographs and shuffling that business from one place to another. Memory card to hard drive to back up and so on. Gonna try to have something completely new up in the next few. Have a great night. Excited to see a hint of new. Enjoy the night. m.

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